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[icon] Crazy Diamond
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Subject:since when did i care so much?
Time:09:30 pm
Current Mood:sadsad and alone
I am 5 days away from 20 decades of life.

sooooo my weekend just got completely screwed over. jackie left on wednesday for like a month. so its just going to be me and kimmy for a while. buttttttt kimmy left for the weekend. took her car. soooooooo now im here at home. with no car. just me and the cats. im home with 3 cats.
so now im just really disappointed and in a bad mood. im skipping class tomorrow. too much of a hassle to try and figure out how to get out there. i have options. but dont want to take them basically. i dont think im really going to miss that much.
corey was supposed to come up this weekend. so it was going to be ok that everyone else was leaving. buttttttttttt now he found out he has to work. i shouldnt have gotten my hopes up that he would be here when he wasnt even sure he could come.

sad day :(
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Subject:one final left
Time:05:36 am
Current Mood:calmcalm
so i studied in the library today from 1am-4:30

i have decided it would be nice if they had fish tanks on every floor. like in the wall or something. not necessarily big ones. just you know a tank or two. i think it would be very calming in an otherwise high strung environment.

but now im back at my place. i need to get back to studying.
almost done. one more test left. 10 am tomorrow.
then packing and moving galore
ack! all im gonna want to do tomorrow is sleep.....
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Current Location:my rooooooooom
Subject:hi. its me again
Time:04:20 pm
Current Mood:awakeawake
And though the course may change sometimes
Rivers always reach the sea

um raise your hand if you're tired of school and you'd rather sit around and listen to Led Zeppelin and play solitaire
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Subject:catharthis: good and bad
Time:04:51 am
Current Mood:lovedloved
soooooooo its finals week
i have four exams.
they start tomorrow.
physics at 12:30

so yeah. im wayyyyyyyy not in the mood to study aka i have no motivation AT ALL aka ive barely done anything and it is now about 5 am aka i cant even make myself care :( and that scares me
but corey ont he other hand, has no exams. zero. what the heck?! stupid boy has had the easiest semester evveeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrr. very frustrating.
so ive basically been complaining to him all night and hes just been encouraging me to keep studying. but blah i really dont want to.
so anyway, im talking to him on the phone (its about 415) and hes like hey let me call you back in like 10 minutes i gotta finish putting this stuff away. so im like sure whatever. he calls me back. turns out instead of "putting stuff away" he actaully drove over here to give me a kiss and a hug! i didnt even believe him but i went downstairs and sure enough, there he is! annnnnnnnnnnnnndddddd he brought me a slurpee too! :)

seriously who knew corey james atkins would be so good at scoring points in the great boyfriend department. i def did not expect this. buttttttt i love it.

dont know why im posting here. no where else to just type i guess.
i really dont want to study. but i really need to. my grades depend on it. and my scholarships depend on my grades. and my scholarships dictate how much school i get and how much school i get determines future career/lack thereof!

goal for this week: do not have mental breakdown
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Current Location:dorm
Time:05:26 am
Current Mood:happyhappy
so its 530 in the morning. im doing hmwk and watching random youtube videos. rachela nd corey are also still up. so we;'re all kinda feeding off each other. im not in a hurry to go to bed. i should be though. i napped today that was nice. mmm 5 hours of undisturbed sleep.

but anyway corey sent this to me. its wonderful he said it was us. dont know why im posting it but oh well. enjoy
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Current Music:screaming infidelities
Current Location:around
Subject:why hello there
Time:02:47 am
i havent updated in a really long time.

man. i feel like so much is happening right now.
kinda feel in over my head.
i need to get back to wesley i think that will make me feel better. or how about jsut back to God in general. not necessarily church

man oh man.
i try so hard not to think too much. i try so hard not to analyze.
but oy, its so hard not to.

feelin weird,
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Current Music:classical, npr
Subject:its 6 am
Time:06:14 am
Current Mood:blankblank
sometimes im scared because i dont know what i want.

what if i end up with nothing?
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Time:02:12 am
i take showers for the symmetry of the tile
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Current Music:sweet silence
Current Location:dormarama
Subject:I am Jack's medulla oblongata. but i dont know how to spell it
Time:05:48 am
Current Mood:gratefulgrateful
sometimes staying up late is quite liberating.
especially if you're the only one up.
now if ur just terribly sleepy the whole time, thats no fun. but if u are actually legitimately awake at sayyyyyyy 436 in the morning...... its quite a feeling. its like woa. think of all the things i can accomplish. im so much less distracted bc theres no one awake to talk to (except for the occasional brittertran) theres much more time int he day when ur awake all the time. can u imagine being an insomniac. oy that'd be crazy. but it would get old fast i  imagine. so yeah i have a paper due at 9 tomorrow. aka less than 5 hours from now. right? pshhhh i dont even know . who wants to do math at this time anyway.  well actually i used to be pretty good at calc way late like this. u see the trick is get past that inital sleepy window and then ur free as a bird to be as productive (or incredibly unproductive) as you want. but u gotta be careful and watch ur time bc eventually u will get sleepy again and then WABAM ur extra time to get stuff done is GONE. zip. nada. zero.
i feel like going running.
nah i feel like going to the beach condo and eating candy and popsicles and hotdogs.
orrrrrrr how about we go back to the lake house. right now. haha i stayed up all night for that too. how interesting. good times man.
does anybody even read this anymore. i check it every so often but nobosy relaly updates. and my updates are of no intellectual value. im not even gonna read this over before i press submit or go or whatever it is.
so i should be writing a paper. but im not. im on facebook. stupid facebook. its very boring really if u think about it.
i guess like staying up late. i tend to do it alot.
i was up til 630 last night. did i already say that? i dunno
anyway i hear its not good for u though. thats too bad.
oh well. ima not change a thing. good thing im young. i like being young. dont really want to be old anytime soon. 19 is way old enough.
 oh man.

k i guess thats enough. i just blabbered for a good 10 minutes. awesome.

oh.....but no matter how i feel now, i know im going to hate myself tomorrow
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Current Location:home
Time:05:38 pm
Current Mood:frustratedfrustrated
i like being home
i dont like thanksgiving break
its such a tease.

i miss my friends and family and time to spend with all of them and not having to pick and choose.
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[icon] Crazy Diamond
View:Recent Entries.
View:Website (For Kicks Like Woa--> click here).
You're looking at the latest 10 entries, after skipping 10 newer ones.
Missed some entries? Then simply jump back 10 entries or forward 10 entries